courtneynessx

I hate this. The end!

The first time I'd ever "met" my dad was when I was three weeks old. I haven't seen or heard from him since... until now! I found his number last night (Oh, thank you internet!) and called and left a message. He called me back this morning and wants to fly me up to NJ to meet his family!!

It's easier to pretend I don't care.

I auditioned last night and I hope I get the part of Beth. YES! We go back tonight at 7:15 P.M. again. Woooooooooo!!!

WHY IS IT THAT WHEN I REALLY NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO, NO ONE IS THERE?


I HAVE SHITTY FRIENDS. THEY'RE NOT EVEN FRIENDS.

I am curvy, healthy, smart, beautiful and talented. I will never let anyone take that from me.


=)


I hope all of you out there on livejournal appreciate the wonderful things about yourselves. Don't ever let anyone take that away.

I went to the dermatologist today for a follow up and a few questions. I got a wart caught very early on frozen with LIQUID NITROGEN! Whew, that stuff hurts!!


WHATABEAUTIFULDAY!

I've never been one to just move on. I linger and wait... for the perfect moment. The one that is perfect in my mind but is stuck in the vortex of "Probably Won't Happen." Despite that, I keep hoping that maybe one day that perfect moment won't slip me by and I can reach out and hang on to it for as long as I possibly can. Perhaps I need to move on and stop hoping. I can ask myself if it's worth it, but my head and my heart and my gut all have seperate opinions that leave me confused. I can never know which one to trust because the more I listen to one, the others get louder and louder. I tear myself apart. I wish I could say "in the end", but really there is no end. It keeps spinning and spinning and spinning...

h8h8h8 told me that cynica told minty_peach that they saw me talking to bloodypinkbunny and talking crap about freeasbirds. Whatever! And yeah. You might guess I don't give a flying f*** what they think anymore. I'm over that.

Oh yeah. I don't know why disorderata went all psycho over me and breakingthrunow having a little fun.

This entry automatically generated by the LJ Drama Generator!

My grandmother is SUCH A BITCH!

I hate it when my subscription ends. :(

I am completely.

Today is the big day of the audition! So, I bet you are all asking yourselves how it went. I crashed and burned. OH, YOU KNOW I'M JUST KIDDING. The audition went very smoothly and I believe I did very well. I even got a few compliments from a few other auditionees!

In other news, I feel ignored by my friends. ;( krrriii.

Tomorrow I might be driving to Oklahoma to pack my things and then Monday my parents will help me move back. I say might because we're having some scheduling conflicts.

I feel like everything and everyone is eating me alive. I hear that I have so much "potential", I just don't apply myself. Answer me this: How does one apply oneself? I want to be a student again and actually study hard and do this so-called apply myself.

Jason and I just went through a big breakup and now we are back together. I'm not sure if everything's fixed or not. Everytime I talk to him, and sometimes to anyone, I get so frustrated and flustered that I lose my temper.

One of the things that is bothering me is my career choice. I desperately want to be in the entertainment industry but I am not sure if I have the talent and confidence. It's been a long time since I have been on stage but I know in my heart that I have such a love for acting. It seems like I have an unquenchable thirst for it! Even though I have previously taken acting classes, I feel as though I'm back at the beginner's level. That's okay, I just wish I could find some relatively inexpensive acting classes somewhere surrounding the Dallas area.

I have an audition tomorrow at 2:30 PM with the Irving community theatre production, In Defense of Better Days. I am nervous.

My baby girl, Patches. :D

Today I'm trying to change my ways for the rest of my life! I'm going to be the sweet, compassionate, neat young lady that I am.

I plan on surprising the hell out of Jason once he gets home by having a (almost) clean house.

I love him. ♥

Why is our house infested with spiders? *shudder* Jason and I hate spiders.

I just went out to empty the kitty litter and as I was pouring the litter in the trashcan, I looked down at my leg and saw a SPIDER CRAWLING ON ME. I can still _feel_ the crawling sensation all over me. I hate this!!!

Anyway, I'm cleaning the house today because I have a week (6 days, really) to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING :D until my job interview next Wednesday! Yesss! I love to jam to CDs while no one's home. :)

i'm sick of all the "i'm androgynous and I'M SO COOL!" just... go suck an egg.